Fiat Lux

My blog has been going for about 6 months now, and I'm still enjoying the process. Keeping a more or less public diary is an interesting challenge. There's things I've been meaning to blog about for months (such as my thoughts on my ipod), and then there's the things that I feel are too personal to write about in a forum that is, thanks to Google, more or less permanently archived. Then there's the issue of making time at all to post - with no Net access from work, I can only post at home, and I'm frequently too tired to take the 30-60 minutes it takes me to compose my thoughts, gather references (if necessary) and put together a spell-checked, more or less thoughtful post. And then, there's the things I know I want to write about, but somehow when I actually sit down to blog, I fin myself posting about a completely different topic.

Today, for example, I'd been meaning to either finish off my review of William Gibson's "Pattern Recognition" or rant a bit about Nordstrom's unique egotism when it comes to hiring. But instead, this post is about something else.

I've noticed some interesting results from my webstats page. The little review I posted on The Davinci Code - one of the first posts to my blog, in fact - has generated the vast majority of traffic to the site. For example, in the month of February 2003, it generated more than 80% of my overall traffic, which comprises between 40-50 unique visits to the site per day. Not bad for an unadvertised personal blog that scarcely a handful of friends link to.

I'm somewhat amused by this, because IMO the review is not particularly thorough or insightful. But for whatever reason, it's gotten into the search engines and people are reading it. I've considered going back and expanding on it, knowing that it's getting so much traffic, but have decided to leave it be for now.

Some other phrases that pop up regularly in the Search Strings report: "schroedinger's cat", "lagniappes", and "donald rumsfeld vietnam". Most depressing search string: "jews are bad" - although the silver lining is that if someone is really looking for proof that jews are bad, my site isn't going to help them. And most offbeat: "are there trees that don't change colors" - now how did that string get someone to my blog?

I'd post a link to the webstats page itself but I 'd need to change the robots.txt file first, to make sure the search engines don't go nuts on all the links within the stats pages. And I have to get ready for work now - my blogging time for the day is done.

Just finished a 7 day stretch of work, no thanks to the gal who quit without giving notice. I get one day off, then 6 more days of work. Repeat for the next three weeks or until I finish staffing up the store, whichever comes first.

What I want to do tomorrow: get a pedicure, go clothes shopping, have a nice dinner somewhere.

What I'll probably end up doing: laundry, grocery shopping, clean the house, catch up on some paperwork.

I need a vacation!

The flowers that bloom in the spring,
Tra la,
Breathe promise of merry sunshine.
As we merrily dance and we sing,
Tra la,
We welcome the hope that they bring,
Tra la,
Of a summer of roses and wine.

(The Mikado, Act II)

The cherry blossoms are starting to bud at work this week. The sun has been shining for the past several days, and it's starting to feel like Spring in California.

Unfortunately, things continue to be screwed up at work. The ongoing understaffing issue has moved well into the realm of the bizarre. The most recent hire started Saturday. On Sunday, she was in a car accident and is now in the hospital. I don't have all the details but it sounds like she'll be fine eventually. For now, though, she's out of commission, and no idea when or if she's going to be coming back to work. And I'm still significantly understaffed.

What I can't figure out is, if the job market is so tough these days, why is it so hard to hire people to sell shoes? For months now, this store has suffered through a string of people who either quit within a week, are incompetent, and/or have attitude issues. The stress of having to deal with the lack of staff caused my predecessor to resign, and after only 3 weeks it's starting to get to me, too.

Despite the fact that I am not normally a superstitious person, I am starting to think something is beyond the normal range of wrong about the string of bad luck we've been having. I need to get the store feng shui'ed or something - anything to change the current vibe and help us get a full staff onboard.

At least we have the pretty cherry blossoms to admire, and the sweet smell of Spring in the air.

Since 2/29 I've had exactly one day off, and as of last night I don't have another day off on the schedule, thanks to my backup taking an emergency leave of absence. I am TIRED and really, really stressed out. I'm not a robot. I need time off, to recharge my batteries, be with my husband, and take care of mundane things like laundry, never mind trying to have a life.

I have no intention of putting up with this level of stress for much longer. The main thing that's kept me from screaming louder about the situation is my vacation, scheduled to commence on 3/31. If I have to, I'll grit my teeth and slog through until then, but once I'm back from Rome, things need to change, and quickly.

A drone at the corporate HR department told me that since I am an exempt employee, there is no limit to how many hours I can be made to work nor how few days off I can have. Frankly I'm not sure that's really legal, but I haven't had time to find out what the situation really is.

Anyway, I'll try to keep blogging regularly but if I post less frequently, now you know why.

On the good news front, my car is back from the shop again. Here's hoping I've used up my accident quota for the next 20 years or so.

Well, maybe he's not fat. But he got nailed flat-out lying on "Face The Nation" this weekend. I've added some emphasis but this is a verbatim transcript.
Source: http://www.cbsnews.com/htdocs/pdf/face_031404.pdf

Participants: BOB SCHIEFFER - CBS News, Secretary DONALD RUMSFELD - DOD, THOMAS FRIEDMAN - The New York Times

SCHIEFFER: Well, let me just ask you this. If they [Iraq] did not have these weapons of mass destruction, though, granted all of that is true, why then did they pose an immediate threat to us, to this country?

Sec. RUMSFELD: Well, you're the--you and a few other critics are the only people I've heard use the phrase `immediate threat.' I didn't. The president didn't. And it's become kind of folklore that that's--that's what's happened. The president went...

SCHIEFFER: You're saying that nobody in the administration said that.

Sec. RUMSFELD: I--I can't speak for nobody--everybody in the administration and say nobody said that.

SCHIEFFER: Vice president didn't say that? The...

Sec. RUMSFELD: Not--if--if you have any citations, I'd like to see 'em.

Mr. FRIEDMAN: We have one here. It says `some have argued that the nu'--this is you speaking--`that the nuclear threat from Iraq is not imminent, that Saddam is at least five to seven years away from having nuclear weapons. I would not be so certain.'

Sec. RUMSFELD: And--and...

Mr. FRIEDMAN: It was close to imminent.

Sec. RUMSFELD: Well, I've--I've tried to be precise, and I've tried to be accurate. I'm s--suppose I've...

Mr. FRIEDMAN: `No terrorist state poses a greater or more immediate threat to the security of our people and the stability of the world and the regime of Saddam Hussein in Iraq.'

Sec. RUMSFELD: Mm-hmm. It--my view of--of the situation was that he--he had--we--we believe, the best intelligence that we had and other countries had and that--that we believed and we still do not know--we will know.

Do people like Rumsfeld really think that people won't call them on what they said in the past, that people will only believe what they're told right now? How stupid do they think Americans are?

I'm 38 years old.

When I look in the mirror, I sometimes remember being in my painting class in college and trying to do a self-portrait. It was not one of my more successful works. I could never get my own face right - the angles eluded me somehow.

When I look in the mirror, I don't see myself as having changed all that much from that 20 year old struggling with paint and brushes. The lines on my forehead are a bit more defined, but otherwise I don't think I look all that different. The hair is longer than it was then, and it's bottle-auburn shot through with bits of grey, not blonde. But the face is the same.

I wonder, will I still look in the mirror when I'm 70 and be able to see that same girl?

Well, most of them are, if Richard Clarke is to be believed, and it certainly sounds like he's credible. Anyone who read Bob Woodward's "Bush At War" will not be surprised by Clarke's charge that administration members wanted to invade Iraq as of September 12, 2001. Only now, the press seems more ready to pay attention to that fact.

There's a great article at the Center for American Progress' webaite detailing how Clarke is right and the Bushies are liars. Now, I'm well aware that this is a progressive website and there's the danger of bias, but unless they're lying in the quotes they cite, I'm pretty sure they've nailed this one. Here's a sample:

CLAIM #1: "Richard Clarke had plenty of opportunities to tell us in the administration that he thought the war on terrorism was moving in the wrong direction and he chose not to." – National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice, 3/22/04

FACT: Clarke sent a memo to Rice principals on 1/24/01 marked "urgent" asking for a Cabinet-level meeting to deal with an impending Al Qaeda attack.

And just think, this is the 'leader of the Free World' and his closest cohorts doing all this lying.

I wasn't planning on blogging any more about the 9/11 inquiries and Richard Clarke this week. As I've said before, 9/11 is a painful subject for me so I try not to stir the embers too often. But a friend, we'll call her Patty, posted the following on a messageboard I frequent and she made a lot of sense.

i could give a rat's ass about whose party did what. i rarely if ever get into these political threads because i can't stand all the fingerpointing and nonsense. basically, what i'm trying to say is if you clear away all the bullshit on BOTH sides, what is happening in our government is frightening. unprecedented. everyone is too ****ing busy worrying about who did what to whom and what party is responsible to take a cold hard look at that shit. patriot act, no press conferences, no accountability whatsoever, staff jumping ship like there's no tomorrow and consistently telling horror stories, LIES LIES LIES that pretty soon no spin in the world is going to cover or hide.

this is much more serious than a blowjob

i ask again, WHERE IS THE OUTRAGE??? it doesn't matter whose SIDE you are on. any american should want answers. if they have nothing to hide, then they should be happy, no, PROUD to speak on the record re: their actions re: keeping america safe, blah blah blah. all his EFFORTS, all HE'S DONE. prove it then. let's hear it. i want to, don't YOU?

isn't that what bush is going on and on about? isn't that his bread and buttah stump speech? "i'll save you, i know what i'm doing!"

okay then. show me your track record. TELL US. we're listening.

hey, he was ELECTED. he is ACCOUNTABLE, as are his staff. to US.
put up or shut up. obviously they're afraid of something or they wouldn't be scurrying around like rats trying to dummy everyone the **** up.

Posted with permission. I bleeped out a bit of profanity.

So the Senate passed an "Unborn Victims of Violence Act" today. This heinous piece of legislation defines an "unborn child" as any child in utero, which it says "means a member of the species homo sapiens, at any stage of development, who is carried in the womb." In other words, from the moment sperm meets egg.

This is some scary stuff for people who believe that a woman should have the right to control her own life and her own reproductive system. If it's a crime for a 3rd party to harm a fetus, it's a pretty small step to making it a crime for the mother herself to harm said fetus. And once that's the case, then is it that big a step to having the goverment control what a woman can and can't do, or eat, or drink? Whether she can get on an airplane, or even drive a car while pregnant?

Hell, let's just send all women who become pregnant off to special pregnancy camps, where they can stay for 40 weeks and incubate, only doing exactly what the government thinks is good for them during that time. Never mind the woman's rights. It's all about the fetus.

Think it could never happen in America?

Just wait. If Bush is re-elected, I'll lay good odds that Roe v Wade goes down during his 2nd term.

This month has really sucked, as far as work goes. But things are (dare I say it?) getting better. One of my staffers from the Santa Rosa store agreed to start working in Corte Madra with me and today was her first day.

What a relief it is to have her there! It's amazing how much more smoothly things run with the addition of just one more person in the store. I can go buy supplies for the store or take lunch without worrying and rushing back as soon as possible, becasue if there's a wave of customers when I'm out, there's two people to handle it, not just one. Things stay more organized and get done faster because there's that extra pair of hands. And there's someone else who can help me with the load of managament tasks I've had to do alone for the past 6 weeks.

Better still, on Wednesday we head out for Italy! There's a lot to get done between now and then, but I've been trying to stay organized and plan as much as possible, so we don't get tripped up by last minute issues. We need to pick up a few odds and ends for the trip, and I need to get laundry done, but overall we're pretty much ready.

The one thing I regret is that I've been so damn busy I have not had much time to review the "Living Language" Italian CDs I ordered. I hate being an ignorant tourist who can't speak the language of the place she's visiting but we'll have to wing it with the phrasebook.

In short, I'm starting to feel like I'm coming out of the tunnel I've been plowing through since taking over the Corte Madera store. Long may it last!

We leave for Rome tonight, so this will most likely be the last blog update until April 10. I'm told our hotel has Internet access but I want to enjoy Rome while I'm there, not spend my time in front of a computer.

Of course, my PC picked last night to stop recognizing my iPod, so I was up very very late trying to get the two of them talking again. That's done, and 2 audio books are ready for listening on the flight.

We also discovered, almost by accident, some financial upheaval - it seems someone got one of Scott's passwords and attempted to transfer all the money in our checking and savings account to our American Express card, then to buy expensive stuff with it. Luckily for us, we found out about it after all the cash had been transferred out of our bank but before it had been moved out of AmEx. Unluckily for us, the person who did this cleaned out our checking and savings accounts the day before our trip and two days before rent is due. AmEx can refund us the money but it will take some time for them to do so.

So overall, our luck held, but it's still a pretty sucky thing to have happen to you. We're off to the bank early this AM to see what else we can do to get things straightened out. We don't have to leave for the airport until 3pm, so there's time enough for that, a few loads of laundry, and packing, but that's about it.

Ciao all! See you when I get back.