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December 1, 2005

Bwahahaha!

At the USF business school, faculty members have rectangular windows built into their doors; I assume it's to make the closed office doors less intimidating, but it could just be a fancy of the architect's. At any rate, many professors put paper over the windows to maintain their privacy. Thanks to this little gem of a one-act play, next time on campus I'll be looking at the papered-over windows in a different light.

One of the least attractive members of the faculty has both a papered-over door AND a couch in his office.... ugh. I'm going to think about something else for a while.

December 24, 2005

Holiday Weekend Amusement for Savoyards

I've been saving this link for an appropriate time, and the holiday weekend seems as good as any. Besides, I'm feeling a little nostalgic for my long-ago days on the stage.

The Gilbert & Sullivan Quiz

Actually it is multiple quizzes, although you don't have to take all of them. If you're a little unsure as to whether you ought to click through the link, here's a pre-quiz:

1) Have you seen "Topsy Turvy"?
2) Do you know who 'The Slave of Duty' was?
3) Do you know what a 'Savoyard' is?

If you answered no to all three, don't bother clicking through. If you answered no to one or two, you might try clicking through for the heck of it. If you rolled your eyes at how insanely easy my questions were, you've probably clicked through to the quiz already, but if you haven't, go, have fun.

February 18, 2006

This Made Me Laugh

In the "OMG I can't believe sane people actually do this' zone:

A note to China's half-billion men: no matter how tightly you shut your eyes and wish and wish and want to believe, eating schlong will not help you get boners.

What an amazing world we live in.

Belated Hat Tip: Rangelife.

February 22, 2006

And a Laugh Amidst The Craziness

Mr. Shakes had a VERY amusing experience the other day. Just go read it. You'll be glad you did.

March 19, 2006

Favorite Swear Words

This is definitely NOT work-safe (or kid-safe) but very funny: a video clip with a bunch of TV actors telling us their favorite swear words. Apparently it was part of a promotional campaign for Channel 4 over in the UK.

I like it, although it's one of those commercials that will be remembered more for the content than for the actual product it's supposed to be promoting.

April 25, 2006

You Know You're From New York When...

Chain e-mail from my sister in law, but this one's a hoot. And very true.

You know you're from New York when...

1. You're 35 years old and don't have a driver's license.

2. You ride in a subway car with no air conditioning just because there are seats available.

3. You take the train home and you know exactly where on the platform the doors will open that will leave you right in front of the exit stairway.

4. You know what a 'regular' coffee is. (For you non-NYers, this is a coffee with milk and sugar)

5. It's not 'Manhattan'; it's 'The City'.

6. There is no north and south. It's "uptown" or "downtown." If you're really from New York you have absolutely no concept of where north and south are.... (and east or west is "cross-town"!)

7. You cross the street anywhere but on the corners and you yell at cars for not respecting your right to do it.

8. You move 3,000 miles away, spend 10 years learning the local language and people still know you're from Brooklyn the minute you open your mouth.

10. You return after 10 years and the first foods you want are a "real" pizza and a "real" bagel.

11. A 500 square foot apartment is large.

12. You know the differences between all the different Ray's Pizzas.

13. You are not under the mistaken impression that any human being would be able to actually understand a PA announcement on the subway.

14. You wouldn't bother ordering pizza in any other city.

15. You get ready to order dinner every night and must choose from the major food groups which are: Chinese, Italian, Mexican or Indian.

16. You're not the least bit interested in going to Times Square on New Year's Eve.

17. Your internal clock is permanently set to know when alternate sides of the street parking regulations are in effect.

18. You know what a bodega is.

19. Someone bumps into you, and you check for your wallet.

20. You don't even notice the lady walking down the road having a perfectly normal conversation with herself.

21. You pay "only" $230 a month to park your car.

22. You cringe at hearing people pronounce Houston St. like the city in Texas.

23. The presidential visit is a major traffic jam, not an honor.

24. You can nap on the subway and never miss your stop.

25. The deli guy gives you a straw with any beverage you buy, even if it's a beer.

That's New York, baby! Ya gotta love it.

August 27, 2006

And On The Lighter Side

Your Birthdate: March 1
You are a natural born leader, even if those leadership talents haven't been developed yet.
You have the power and self confidence to succeed in life, and your power grows daily.
Besides power, you also have a great deal of creativity that enables you to innovate instead of fail.
You are a visionary, seeing the big picture instead of all of the trivial little details.

Your strength: Your supreme genius

Your weakness: Your inappropriate sensitivity

Your power color: Gold

Your power symbol: Star

Your power month: January

October 5, 2006

"Stephen Colbert" on Housing

The Mess That Greenspan Made has a well-done "guest blogging" spot but Stephen Colbert on America's current housing market.

His conclusion:

So all you schadenfreuders out there, you can wipe that smile off your face because the housing bubble isn't a bubble at all - and if it ain't a bubble, it ain't gonna pop. I know this because I just read Kendra Todd's article at Yahoo! Real Estate where she said that the bubble is a myth and that, "real estate markets in many areas are going through a normal correction cycle."

[It was an ad - look at the URL - it says promo]

I'm expecting a soft landing for housing and there's nothing to worry about.

[Until next year]

I'm also expecting peace to break out all over the world, energy supplies to remain plentiful and cheap forever, the trade and budget deficits to correct quickly and painlessly, Republicans and Democrats to end their bickering, real wages to rise, health care costs to fall, education to improve, and all the world's religions to merge seamlessly into a single unified understanding of God.

Heh. Well done.

April 21, 2007

WMDs in Iraq? Put a Ribbon On Your SUV!

Two things that jumped out at me this morning:

1) Glenn Greenwald's piece on the new WMD conspiracy theory currently making the right-wing rounds. Here's a hint: any theory which requires the complicity of hundreds if not thousands of government workers on all parts of the political spectrum is utter BS. Doesn't matter what theory you're talking about, that's just basic human nature.

2) This excellent video (slightly NSFW, profanity):

July 1, 2007

Too Funny!

By way of Ezra, Nancy Grace & The Animals. I have no idea if this thing is real or fake, but either way it is VERY funny.

WARNING: May not be work safe.

July 10, 2007

iPhone, meet jPhone

Had a rough day. Scott took a spill off his bike en route to work, so we spent a few hours in Kaiser Hell getting him checked out. All's well now, but it was a long and draining day.

So, as I was cleaning out my overloaded e-mail in-box tonight, I found this jewel that Jason sent to me a few days ago.

Too funny!

August 9, 2007

A Little Geek Humor

Scene: Our bedroom. Scott has loaded a flavor of Linux onto a thumb drive and is booting it up his laptop.

Scott: "Look at that. Kernel panic."

Me: (looks at screen) "It's not doing anything. Doesn't seem all that panicked to me."

Scott (pulling out the thumb drive, rebooting): "Very funny."

Fast-forward a minute or two.

Me: "How's that kernel panic doing? Has it been promoted to a General Protection Fault yet?"

Scott: "That is so. not. funny."

Me: can hardly breath I am laughing so hard at my own joke.

About Humor

This page contains an archive of all entries posted to Fiat Lux in the Humor category. They are listed from oldest to newest.

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