Save The Date: January 30, 2008

I don’t actually have a MySpace account, but this post on Bloggasm made me smile on an otherwise gloomy day. For those of you who are on MySpace, it’s time to get with the program:

If you’re reading this and you’ve experienced any of the things on the list below, your account may be in need of deletion:

1. You rarely log in to Myspace except to delete spam friend requests from nude webcam girls.

2. You spend five minutes writing a wall post only to hit an error message when you try to post it because of all the website glitches.

3. You’re a girl who constantly gets marriage proposals from random men in the middle east.

4. You visit someone’s Myspace profile only to suddenly have music start blasting out of your speakers. Bonus points if it happens to you while you’re at work.

5. You have to make redundant clicks to perform simple tasks because Myspace keeps taking you to advertisement pages where you have to click on “return to myspace profile” in order to continue what you’re doing.

6. You visit someone’s profile only to have your eyes bleed because of terrible page layout with non-matching designs and font colors.

7. Your experience is hindered because of intrusive banner ads that either talk to you or try to reach out and block your view of what you’re trying to look at.

8. You read yet another news account about how some child predator using Myspace has abducted a little girl or that some hoax Myspace account has caused a teenager to commit suicide.

9. You’re frustrated with the fact that Myspace doesn’t allow you to post your contact info, meaning to contact someone you can only use Myspace’s glitchy Instant Messenger, message/email system, or wall commenting.

10. You’re tired of seeing Tom stare out at you from millions of friends lists and just wish he would change his f*cking profile picture.

Have any of these things happened to you? Well you’re the perfect candidate for Myspace deletion. Join me on Wednesday, January 30th by deleting your Myspace account. You won’t regret it!

Presidential Milkshakes 2008

This has been making the rounds today, I’ve seen versions both on blogs and in e-mail, so I am not sure which one is the original:

Presidential Milkshakes 2008

I support your milkshake, even though I opposed drinking your milkshake four years ago. -Mitt Romney

I’ll drink your milkshake, but only if the Bible says it’s allowed. -Mike Huckabee

I will drink your milkshake for another 100 years, if that’s what it takes. -John McCain

I drank a milkshake on 9/11. -Rudy Giuliani

I’ll drink your milkshake a few months after everyone else does. -Fred

I will drink your milkshake, but only if I can bring back the gold standard before paying for it. -Ron Paul

America deserves a new milkshake, a milkshake with a change. -Barack Obama

I will fight the corporations so that you can drink your own milkshake. -John Edwards

We have 35 years of milkshake-drinking experience. *sob* -Hillary Clinton

I will peacefully drink your milkshake. -Dennis Kucinich

Global warming is melting your milkshake. -Al Gore

It depends on what your definition of “milkshake” is. -Bill Clinton

We’re making good progress in the war on milkshakes, and make no mistake: we will prevail. -George W. Bush

My favorite? The Gore one.

A Little Geek Humor

Scene: Our bedroom. Scott has loaded a flavor of Linux onto a thumb drive and is booting it up his laptop.

Scott: “Look at that. Kernel panic.”

Me: (looks at screen) “It’s not doing anything. Doesn’t seem all that panicked to me.”

Scott (pulling out the thumb drive, rebooting): “Very funny.”

Fast-forward a minute or two.

Me: “How’s that kernel panic doing? Has it been promoted to a General Protection Fault yet?”

Scott: “That is so. not. funny.”

Me: can hardly breath I am laughing so hard at my own joke.